Hello again guys.

So a lot has finally calmed down around the house. My sister finally sent all of her family back to Michigan. None of them really needed to be there at all. Half of them had never even met my father. I assume they were there for the free trip to Arizona and not to visit my ill father. Oh well, they are gone now; the house is now a lot less hectic.

My sister Tammy flew in last week from New Jersey. This surprised everyone but me. I knew she was coming thanks to the magic of social networking, ha. I will tell you though, when my two sisters are in the same room you can cut the tension with a knife it was so palpable. I was glad to see her though, even if my other sisters side of the family was fuming.

And now in about a week, my sister and brother-in-law should be headed back to Michigan. I would not have been able to do much without them being there for my dad in terms of paperwork and speaking with doctors because I'm still working full-time. I appreciate that much, but there comes a time when it's finally right to pack up and go own with their own lives.
X
I found out, weeks before my dad had his 15 hour surgery, what was said between Dr. Nagazato and my father. When asked (in front of my sister and brother-in-law) if there was one person to take care of him during the recovery months that followed he answered quickly and firmly. "My son Sam will be there, he's 21 and he can take care of me," he told them. I later found out that this sent my 40-something sister into an angry attention starved frenzy as she didn't get recognition as the "golden child" from my dad that she has strived for all of my 21 years here.

There's an old saying that is relevant to this situation that I'd like to use. I'm paraphrasing but it goes something like: "visitors are like fish; they begin to smell after three days." Now you can imagine 4 months now of this odor getting worse and worse and I'm just relieved to know it's almost over. You know what, I don't care if they believe I'm the black sheep of my dad's children. My dad loves me unconditionally and nothing will ever change that.

I'm holding up. I have to learn this bile removal thing for my dad with this pump that removes excess. I'm back to full 40 hour weeks at work. It's been over a year since I've had my full hours; I hope it stays that way. I'm seriously considering switching to sales, either part time or full time. It's something that after experiencing it a little bit, I feel as though I have a knack for it.

Jeanie contacted me the other day. She told me she's in rehab; and I'm happy for her. I miss that girl to an extreme degree; I don't even think I've seen her this year at all. That girl was the world to me and not a day goes by that I don't think about her well-being.


As for music, I'd recommend Matisyahu's new album "Light." Also, Third Eye Blinds new album: "Ursa Major."

Anyway, until next time

Cheers,
- Sammers

The day has finally come. My father is home from the hospital after one hell of a long time there. When I saw him yesterday I was very sad to see where his spirits were. He's lost a ton of weight, which is a given after nearly a month in the hospital after the surgery. What disturbed me is how much it seemed like he was ready to give up.

"There's nothing left of me," he said to me yesterday. I told him that we all knew going into this that it was going to be an easy or speedy recovery. On my way out of the hospital though my tears were flowing. He is the strongest man I've ever known in my life and I pray that he will start to feel better emotionally.

I myself am too physically and mentally exhausted. I got into a large argument with my sister and brother in-law over the amount of work they were seemingly imposing on my mother. And tomorrow, they're flying their immediate family out from Michigan to stay at the house. That's two 20 year old nephews, their two wives/girlfriends, and two children of theirs. Even the idea of this happening makes me want to lay down. Also, it's a horrible idea in my eyes because the last thing my dad needs in his recovery at home is kids running around screaming. I've decided I need to stay somewhere for a few days before I implode.

I got an offer to go to Las Vegas Friday and return Sunday night and I'm seriously starting to consider it. I realize though that I can't. My dad wants me to be around and I want to be around him and that's all that matters. It would be nice to have a little vacation but I'd probably end up spending too much money.

I just can't wait for everything to go back to NORMAL.

God damn, what a year 2009 has been. I'll be 22 in September and I'm really not looking forward to my birthday this year.

I am really looking forward to Brand New's new album: "Daisy." I've heard a few of the leaked demos and even heard one of them live when I saw Jesse Lacey last July. Which brings me to my next subject: Brand New is coming back to AZ in October! I'm going to get my tickets next Friday and I'm super stoked.

I'm at work right now listening to some Portugal. The Man (who are also coming to Tucson in September!) on my lunch break. Damn I hate closing, I end up smoking way more cigarettes, ha.

I guess I have a gal that's interested in meeting me through a mutal hangout with my coworker and his girlfriend; we'll see how that one goes. Not really going to just through hoops presenting myself as a potential mate so much. As Popeye says: "I y'am what I y'am and that's all that I y'am." =)

Cheers,
- Sammers

8/2

This weekend wasn't the best. The highlight of the weekend is that my dad is up and moving around in the hospital. He has a CT scan tomorrow so he will most definitely be in there for a few more days. Thank you to everyone who has been inquisitive in making sure my dad is doing alright.

On Friday I took my Ranger to have the oil change. Turns out the vehicle needs a bit of maintenance. I for sure need a new timing belt and a new serpentine belt. They probably each have a few months left of life on them so I gotta get that taken care of. Of course there was a whole bunch of other unnecessary shit they concluded that my truck "needed." I'm going to buy the parts from my work and get them a lot cheaper. After that I'll pay my dad's friend for the labor. All together it should be around 200 bucks. Not bad considering I should be paying around $450, but it's another thorn in my hopes of saving for a laptop and paying off my root canal bill.

Saturday was alright. I got myself a new haircut; it looks nice. Kicked it with Jesse down on 4th pretty much. Some crap made me sad but it's something I've got to deal with.

I'm going to give "Watchmen" a shot.

Cheers,
- Sammers